Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Did I mention that I hate the Holiday season?

From November 21, 2007:

Just as soon as think that things are actually going to get better. And just as soon as I start realizing that I can wade through everything, and finally accept the fact that my dad has remarried and that I need to accept this new part of the family. Things come crashing down. It never fails. I went to church with my dad tonight, something that I ahve been avoiding becuase everytime I go there something bad happens. And lo and behold it did. They just had to sing 3 songs in a row that were played at mom's funeral. not just one or two, but three in a row. How were they supposed to know, they weren't there. Why do I feel that everyone should know not to do things like that? I shouldn't expect everyone to know that I still can't go through those songs with out going back to that horrible august last year. I guess it is just one of those awful things I have to learn to swim through. I never want to get over the fact of loosing my mother, I just want to be able to cope with it. To be able to live with the fact. This is yet another reason that I hate the Holiday Season.

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